Rafflenomics

Truer words have never been spoken!

It is election season in sweet T&T and while I really don't like to discuss local politics here, something happened recently that I felt the compelling need to comment on. This urge came about because what I happened to be listening to made little or no real sense to me upon the first listening. Then when I decided to do the mathematics it made even less sense as a financial strategy.

Before I continue, I do not have any affiliation with any political party; I am just examining public statements and offering a sober and objective analysis on same. Nor should you perceive the analysis as an endorsement of one party over another. I'm trying to be as impartial as possible.

The People's Partnership Coalition. Comprises the United National Congress (UNC), Congress of the People (COP), Tobago Organisation of the People (TOP) and the Movement for Social Justice (MSJ).

At the People's Partnership's Monday Night Forum (the ruling party's weekly public meetings that resemble a campaign meeting although election campaigns have not been officially launched as we have not even been offered an election date), the Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bisessar, SC broached the topic of campaign finance. Declaring that she (note she said "she" and not the party) had no financiers, she told her adoring public that her party would be financing their political campaign via … a raffle.

Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bisessar, SC. She is also the political leader of the coalition's largest partner - the UNC.

This raffle, with a per-ticket cost of just $10, would provide players taking part with an opportunity to win:

1st prize - a brand new car

2nd prize - a full bedroom furniture suite

3rd prize - a fully furnished kitchen suite

No further details were given about the prizes to be offered.

While I applaud the PM's attempts at financial self-sufficiency for her party, the mathematics of such a venture just does not add up and here's why!

We have 41 constituencies here and I shall assume that plans are afoot to offer up candidates in each one. Every candidate who declares for a seat must pay down a deposit of $5000 for that privilege (a fee usually paid by the party he/she represents). This deposit is refundable to the candidate only if he/she polls more than one-eighth or 12.5% of the votes cast for the seat. So, for the UNC to properly register 41 candidates, they are going to need 41 x $5000 = $205000.

Selling raffle tickets at $10 a pop means that just to cover the nomination costs for their candidates, 20500 tickets have to be sold. Do you see the problems here as yet? Nope? Let me see if I can make things clearer …

Since the party has no financiers, those prizes cannot be donated by anyone outside of the party executive. This means the party will have to acquire these prizes on their own. A modest estimate of the cash value of the combined prizes would be around $180000. So, another 18000 tickets would have to be sold to recover the cost of the prizes.

Adding those two figures, we see that just to ensure real prizes for the raffle and to get the nominees on record, at least 38500 tickets will have to be sold. That is a daunting proposition indeed at the very start.

But wait, that can't be all the campaign costs involved? What about transportation, rental of venues, stage and audio-visual equipment, advertising, banners, flyers, promotional items and the like. These are items that have been known to run into several millions of dollars for any political party. Translating that to raffle tickets, literally hundreds of thousands of raffle tickets would have to be sold to adequately cover these kinds of costs.

According to statistics provided by the Elections and Boundaries Commission, the PP gathered over 432000 votes in the last general election. Just to fund the PP campaign, it would seem that they will need every single one of those supporters to purchase at least one raffle ticket. A raffle with nearly half a million tickets sold in T&T; does anyone realistically see that happening?

If you believe that bit of rafflenomics, I have some bridges to sell you ...

I hope that this goes to show that when you listen to campaign talk you should do it with some critical thinking cap firmly on. Otherwise you can whip yourselves into a frenzy over unsubstantiatable nonsense.

Rafflenomics is not the answer to questions over campaign financing; genuine campaign finance reform is!

ScottyPedia will not be swayed by rafflenomics; come better than that!

Stumped by a porcupine ball

I sometimes feel this way but I really don't know everything.

While I can claim knowledge of many things, I have never made the claim that I know everything. Nevertheless, some of my friends are of the firm opinion that I do know everything (hence the ScottyPedia nickname) and in turn try their hand at stumping me with an item I know litte or nothing about.

My friend and media colleague, Nickisha McClean-Parris, has a food-based blog and decided to test the depths of my knowledge recently with this 'simple' query: what is a porcupine ball?

Errr ... I don't know. What is this sorcery you speak of?

Having not heard of this before outside of the animal kingdom, I asked if this was what you referred to when a porcupine tries to protect itself from an enemy, balling itself up to expose his quills to ward off the attack. I was wrong.

She further explained that this was a food item. I correctly guessed that the 'porcupine' name referred to its general appearance but could get no further concerning its composition.

After revelling in her glee at seeing me flounder, she finally revealed the details of this delicacy to me.

Porcupine balls are made from seasoned mincemeat and uncooked rice. After mixed together, they are then cooked in a spaghetti sauce, sometimes sprinkled with cheese.

Meat and potatoes ... YUMMY!!!!!!!

As shown in the picture above, you can pair them with mashed potatoes and even bread as a second day meal.

So, this presented a rare occasion where ScottyPedia did some new learning. And I'm passing it on to you. From what I've heard, it takes about 15-30 minutes to prepare and an hour to cook.

Look at those prickly globes of yumminess!

If you're interested in this and other off-the-beaten-path recipes, please feel free to visit Nickisha's blog via this link.

As for me, I await the opportunity to taste this delicacy as soon as Nickisha finds the time to make it. I'll surely let you all know how that culinary experience goes, whenever it happens! (I have a birthday coming up, so I just might wing it for then!)

Melody's Vibes

Melody (not her real name) is the first lesbian I know personally. By saying that, I mean a lesbian who is my friend and is open about her choice to be who she feels she needs to be. (I know some suspected and 'closet' lesbians too.)

Melody and I met through a mutual friend at an impromptu lime. She is of African descent, has a sapodilla complexion, is of slim build and has a most tantalising torso and lilting gait. In short, she is a head-turner. She is also the mother of a primary school-aged son. She possesses a very lovely singing voice (or so I have been told; I have never had the pleasure of her singing for me).

As I got to know Melody better as an individual, she eventually revealed me parts of her story that helped me to comprehend the person that she had become.

Initially, Melody considered herself a heterosexual female, with a love and affinity for men. Those feelings started to erode during her pre-teen years, triggered by the treatment she received from her maternal grandmother. Melody was the result of an unplanned pregnancy, which both her mother and grandmother openly resented. Her father, though known, was an unreliable absentee drunkard whom they also hated. Melody's mother received an opportunity to go abroad and literally fled T&T, abandoning Melody to her grandmother's care.

Due to the unplanned pregnancy resentment, Granny gave Melody a very hard time, effectively punishing Melody for her mother's sins. Granny was rough in physical treatment and language, often making remarks about sex and sexual organs that were wholly  inappropriate for a primary school child to hear. When Melody started secondary school, her evening ritual upon arriving home was to subject herself to humiliating underwear and vaginal inspections by an ever-skeptical Granny.

For Melody, this led her to perceive sexual intercourse between men and women as not only a forbidden act but a bad one to do as well. Nevertheless she eventually succumbed to peer pressures and had (heterosexual) sex  in her mid-teens.

Perhaps in a bid to escape the terrifying clutches of Granny, she started looking for male companionship that would take care of her material needs. In doing so, she struck up a relationship with Rodney (not his real name). Rodney was a petty drug pusher who seemed to have an endless supply of ready cash to spend on Melody. Pretty soon Melody realised that Rodney's interest in her was almost exclusively as an available sex partner yet not in an exclusive arrangement. When she resisited this arrangement, Rodney would force her into compliance by gunpoint and violence. One of those coercive sessions resulted in her becoming pregnant for Rodney, eventually bearing him a son.

Mustering up as much courage as she could, Melody decided that she and her young son could not live under these conditions and she struck out on her own. And she has more or less been on her own ever since, facing this world as best as she could despite her disadvantageous upbringing. Surprisingly, she gets timely assistance from Rodney's mother, who adores her grandchild and dotes on him whenever possible.

Also, I must say that Melody has a lot of simmering rage just beneath her surface, tending towards anger very easily in situations that may not otherwise warrant polarised, furious responses. She also seems to have issues with authority figures at the workplace, which caused her at one time to switch jobs at a rapid rate.

Her experience with Rodney eventually turned her completely against heterosexual sex, simultaneously giving her a sometimes unhealthy distrust of men. With this realisation, she started to actively seek out the companionship and comfort of women, defining herself as an active (and proud) lesbian since she was 20 years old.

Melody's story came to mind when I was asked by the Lezline Blog about what I thought could make a heterosexual woman convert to lesbianism. I honestly feel that if Melody's upbringing had been more pleasant, she may not have made the choice she made.

I don't want you to think that I have a 'problem' with  Melody's choice (we've gone through several 'hunting in the same forest' jokes over the years, and not once has the thought crossed my mind that I or any other man need to try to 'convert' her). Being a lesbian is not a sign of weakness, inferiority or depravity; it is to me simply a choice of whom you choose to love and receive love from. And it certainly makes Melody a lot happier than when she was with Rodney ...